Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The beginning of goodbye.

Once Cheetah reached the toddler stage we began making preparations for his entry into school.  We drilled him on numbers, colors, and shapes.  We worked with them for weeks on memorizing addresses, phone numbers, and names.  We went shopping for supplies, uniforms, and snacks while using every spare moment as chance to 'teach'.  Tarzan even instructed him on wiping, grooming, and belts.  We answered question after question while explaining life's most difficult quandaries but we brushed over one important situation.  The Goodbye.

We know how we feel; our hearts are so heavy, sad at the sight of him in his uniform, and wanting to wait a bit longer to be sure he's ready.  But what's going on in his head as he heads out into uncharted territory?  How foreign to be dropped off at the door, no one to hoover and remind him to work, who will help open the ketchup, will the new person in his life know what to do if he pukes? 

As the car approaches the morning drop-off lane, my heart plummets deep in my stomach, just waiting for his inevitable tears.  As they begin to fall down his sweet face and he begs for 'just one more kiss' I know he must feel what I do, the beginning of 'goodbye'...

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Just text me...

I have heard people argue that the text message is impersonal and has done damage to the social communication of our teenagers and young adults but I disagree. It’s not intrusive, you can answer when it’s best for you, and most of the small talk is eliminated. There have been many times when it has helped me avoid long phone calls and helped me get information effortlessly. Most importantly it has helped me stay connected to family and friends on a daily basis.

Last week I was going through friendship withdrawals. I was so lonesome for my friends and I wanted nothing more than to have us all gathered around the table enjoying drinks, laughs, and lots of quality time. It was my turn to have a night out while Tarzan wrangled Cheetah in for a bath and hours of the Power Rangers so I headed to one of my favorite restaurants for a fun meal with my friends. Now that I had kid-free time I needed to figure out how I could get them all ‘there’ with me at once.

I decided to send an ‘under cover text’ implying that I was in need of some blog topics and the guests started rolling in. We sat across from each other unloading worries, anger, stress, and some of the funniest stories I had heard in days. When I closed my eyes I could hear their laughter and see their smiles. It was a huge comfort to know that so many of us were living the same daily time line and still feeling inadequate no matter how hard we were trying to push past it all. I laughed out loud on several occasions and even teared up a time or two. As my inbox filled up my heart began to feel lighter and I had to fight the impulse to hug my cell-phone. To the other diners it may have looked like I was dining alone but I was surrounded by my closest friends.

After that wonderful dinner with my inner circle I must argue that the text message isn’t impersonal at all. You make it what it is and to me it is glue that helps me keep ‘it’ together.